Fiercely Loved

Dear Daughters,

You’re not even old enough to read, but there are just some things I need to write down for you. I wish I could share them with you now, but trust that it will be best to wait. For now my words will be tucked away right here – in an online time capsule of sorts – that you’ll get to dig up one day. Whether I have the privilege to show you or you discover them on your own, I hope these words find a safe place in the very depths of your soul. 
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Popcorn Please!

Don’t you just love the smell of popcorn???

At the movie theatre, the farmer’s market, or anywhere else you might get a whiff of this magnificent fragrance – your mouth just starts to water, right? OK, maybe that is just me.

Well, we love making homemade popcorn around here. The other day my oldest daughter, who is almost four (where does the time go?!), and I were having some quiet time while my youngest, who is almost two (seriously??), was napping.

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Moving Closer to Purpose

Recently, I have felt so out of my element. I’m sure you know the feeling. Time is moving, but for some reason it feels like your life is standing still. The days seem foggy. Your motivation is displaced. Relationships feel disoriented, and for some reason, if all that wasn’t enough, you’re fighting the feelings of depression. I used to thrive in the unknown. I used to create something from nothing. What is happening?

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The Intruder

Has it really been 8 months? Do I really have a child, an infant, a daughter? Today I found myself asking this very question. I found myself asking the intruder herself, the infant that has taken over my life (in a cutesy sing-song voice, of course!), “Are you MYYYYYY daughter?”

She smiled. We laughed.

It’s true, she IS mine. All mine. Every cute little inch of her body. Every curl, tiny toe, and silly giggle. Her screams, her cries, her annoyed faces. The moments she gets excited to see me and the moments she is already pushing me away. Mine. My little girl.

As I think back on that moment today… the world stopped. I’m serious. My world completely stopped. The dishes in the sink didn’t exist. The groceries still on the floor from our morning grocery run didn’t matter. There was absolutely nothing that could have distracted me from completely tuning in to her.

She is already growing so fast. This post is my reminder to always remember to stop, enjoy and create special moments. To never get so caught up in chores, a to-do list, or the next “thing” that I miss the moment that is right here… right now.

3am Check-List

When my 8-week old daughter wakes at 3am… here are some things I must remember.
1) My bladder doesn’t matter. Her needs at this insane hour are way more important.
2) When walking into her room cute-high-pitched-greetings will only get me a crazy look saying “mom, really? It’s 3am”
3) Milk THEN diaper.
4) Cut the small talk. I want her to go BACK to bed… not awake for “playtime”
5) After her “mid-night” snack… avoid eye contact, swaddle gently, and exit quickly.

The Rain. My Refuge.

The rain has slowed down. Light raindrops fall from the edge of the roof as the noise from the street begins to upstage the now empty clouds. I just finished my bowl of oatmeal, my breakfast, and its 11:36am on this still Saturday morning. This reminds me, I should go make the bed…

In NY at Bryant Park after some rain. The park was empty. I had it all to myself.

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The Wedding of My Dreams

Photographed by Ariel Cordero

How do you make your wedding day a momentous one?

I don’t have the answer for you and your love, but I can share with you how my husband and I achieved the wedding of our dreams. Our one year anniversary is one month away, and my husband Will and I still laugh and smile about our wedding season. From a beach ceremony in Malibu, California, to a wedding tour across the United States, and then a honeymoon in Puerto Rico we returned home with zero wedding debt and memories we now share with all our family and friends.

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